the prestige of banking

"what do you mean you have to work 100+ hours every week? nobody can do that."

"yeah but what if you're getting paid minimum wage??"

"hmm.."


----------------------


it is everyone's dream in our society to become a banker.

it started when we were kids. coming home from day care, we would see men dressed sharply in dark colored suits, their ties carefully sticking out so you can clearly see the 'ferragamo' label on them, their shoes so shiny that you can spot a blemish in your reflection on the high quality leather, the looks on their faces wore concern, stress, and calculation. constantly barking commands into their blackberries. constantly in motion, checking their watches, fixing their hair. but overall their image screamed money. success. power. as if nothing else matters more than where the Dow Jones closed at today or whether the new drug was approved by the FDA. if it didn't make a dollar, it didn't make sense.

we looked at them with awe and wonder. true businessmen. our parents kept reminding us, 'that is real success in the world. commanding power and respect, making money, living a comfortable life style.' this line, repeated over and over, deeply ingrained itself in my mind. i wanted the money, the success. to feel important. i kept it close to my heart and knew that i wanted to play an integral role in society as a banker.

as a child, i honed my banking and finance skills wherever possible. although many write off the popular boardgame monopoly(tm) as a game of chance, i studied the manual for days and nights and eventually was able to consistently win the game seven out of ten times. instead of playing with a play keyboard or reading a book that emitted plot-related noises like mooing cows and meowing cats, i was busy familiarizing myself with a miniature banking system by Fischer Price. i am even proud to say that i was able to recite the rules on the instruction manual verbatim.

i argued over technicalities in social games with my class mates. to me, being right took precedence over everyone having a good time. i didn't want to be the agreeable pushover. i knew that in order to succeed i had to have an opinion and then yell it in everyone's faces (i saw that in a movie somewhere and it sure as hell worked). needless to say i didn't have that many friends growing up. but i only saw them as future competition for a big pay check so it didn't bother me.

the minute i was able to enroll into a finance program (i chose NYU Stern first for its job placement because, lets be honest, that should be the only criteria for rating schools. i'm not going to pay $200,000+ just for a piece of paper with some no-name signature on it certifying that i learned shit. also, i chose NYU Stern for its student body of finance tools and douches--and i wasn't going to let anyone out douche me) i did. i was so eager to be a part of the finance world that my parents had to convince me with money to wait until my actual graduation year in high school before i went off to college.

choosing to enroll in Stern was a great choice. not only was i able to flash my prior knowledge of financial markets while sitting in the front row of lecture hall classes in the most douche baggery fashion, but also i made friends with a few like minded individuals. granted, we did not celebrate the true rewards of friendship since we were competing for the same jobs (and yes, finding a job and getting paid should be our first priority, lets get real here), but finding acceptance among peers was one joy of life that i had missed out in my childhood. even though, my chief goal of being the best led me to spend so many late nights in solitary confinement pouring over accounting and financial textbooks.

i was having a great time in college. surrounded by aspiring bankers, feeling the competition, learning as much as i can about the world of finance. i sucked so hard and shamelessly at the teat of every professor i had, just in case he or she had a job lead. all i needed was a foot in the door. i padded my resume with the biggest buzzwords--'managing expectations', 'database maintenance', 'industry research network autonomous high frequency trading'--sometimes even creating my own nonsensical phrases just to catch people's eyes. i was so close to my dream life that sometimes i would lie awake in bed, head swimming with thoughts of prestige, glamor, and torso soaked in my own excited anxious ejaculate.

then all shit hit the fan. the wall street financiers, so convinced that they correctly ran the modern world, truly bit off a little more than they can chew and soon enough, the entire financial system, built on a house of tooth picks glued by false ratings and greed, eventually collapsed. and with its explosive demise went my childhood full of solo monopoly games, knowledge of pro forma financials, and my hope that forfeiting my supple virginity to be ravished endlessly by corporate america will land me a dream job.

like there will even be a job available.

my aspirations of becoming a glorified slave, working 100+ hours in the maze of cubicles in a high rise building in manhattan all vaporized in a matter of minutes. me, among thousands of others in the same position, seeing our futures implode, toying with the ideas that we could find other professions. what a shame to graduate college with a finance degree and end up working as a full time baby sitter. suddenly happy hours and $1 beer on tap didn't seem so lame. and forgoing taxi cabs and walking everywhere. little by little, i had to give up what seemed like an attainable dream, the soulless job just within reach.

i spend nights lying awake, wishing i could be stressing over excel worksheets and dreading client meetings. and now, i have all this free time but no greedy corporation to devote it to. i am a mere shell among many many shells, hollow and unfeeling, purposeless, with only the function and intention to carry out corporate america's trivial bidding. my entire upbringing devoted to banking and now, with the demise of that profession, i am lost in the world. soulless, inhuman.

-andy

the Economy

first and foremost, thanks mike gao, who reminded me of the existence of blogs and to the quiet lull between earnings reports that has allowed me some free time at work to frolick among various servers in what we affectionately call the intar webs.

the following is written tongue in cheek :)

----

we are almost there. teetering on the edge, straddling the days of our sheltered suburban public education on one side and a world clouded with uncertainty, hope, and discovery on the other. great, now is the time to finally put to use the hours we spent struggling to attain the 'outstanding mark' in penmanship in the third grade, the knowledge we learned while repackaging the analysis of 'the Great Gatsby' from sparknotes.com for AP Lang, and the understanding of complex social dynamics only derived from stomaching one too many middle school dances. did we ever really know what we were getting ourselves into? what is the long term goal of late night papers and math problem sets?

to make money, my parents said. allright then, making money. but i may have deceived myself into thinking i knew what this meant. selling lemonade or something like that, some milton bradley baby shit. any retard with basic arithmetic skills can do that.

and only a private university--excuse me, a technical/vocational school like NYU stern finance--can fully prepare me for cubicle life. how exciting! the brochure would tell me, while i flip through glossy pictures of smiles, handshakes, opportunities, and success. the world of cubicle life is a world of glory, fighting on the front lines of the battle of finance, always in the line of fire, in the middle of action! and of course, opportunities for great success and money. every word i read made me more excited to be a part of this giant machine that, as they claim, drives the innovation and progress of mankind. i was sold. so where do i sign up, when can i put on that crisp new suit, when do i get my first six figure paycheck?

not so fast, they told me. NYU, the world of finance, wall street, like any organization, requires people to jump through a series of hoops. sure, its not like i've never done that before. so i did. take these classes, join these clubs, say these lines, go through these motions, network like this, don't act too interested, don't act too desperate. before i knew it, it was more than just some plain old pony tricks. it soon became a method of thinking, a way of life. i went in play-doh(tm), molded myself into a small cog, and came out a small piece, uniform with thousands of other pieces, ready to be placed into a big machine. soulless, unthinking, slave.

but i kept qualifying the molding process. its ok, i'll work for a few years and get out, no biggie.

then i was called to duty. the job description detailed all the battle action i will be engaging in, all the excitement and thrill of being on the front line. the financial landscape is constantly changing, always dynamic. be prepared to think quickly on your feet, solve challenging problems on the fly. no weak stomachs, it warned. this is what i believed i was born to do. and damn was i determined to do one hell of a good job.

welcome to cubicle life, i triumphantly told myself. this is it, i made it, i'm doing it. even if i'm failing miserably, i'm doing it. chasing the so-called dream, or was it the dream that they told me i should be chasing? it doesn't matter anymore.

rows and rows and columns and columns of cubicles. people silently tapping away at their keyboards. everyone connected to their computers, hands to the keyboards, eyes to the screens, minds to the computers. this is it, the white collar work place. just like every stereotype of an office that i have seen on TV or in the movies. i'm ready to get started, to get plugged into this giant machine we affectionately refer to as 'The Economy'. i am one impatient baby.

a cold voice refers me to my desk. Row 42, Column AB, like the grid of cubicles is an excel worksheet. on my desk i find two monitors. its like they knew i had ADD, or if i didn't have ADD, i soon will get ADD. i get settled in my black office chair, mess around with the seat height and swivel around in it, feeling the range i get on my chair, how far i can lean back while still being able to use my computer. i fill out some paper work and surf the internet. before i knew it, the work day was ending and people were leaving for home. what a fantastic job, a great first day.

but soon days blurred into weeks blurred into months. the internet was replaced by excel worksheets and microsoft outlook. any idle time for day dreaming was superseded by number crunching and formatting. my fingers became so intimately familiar with the hot keys of excel that when i am working full throttle, my keyboard sounds like one that belongs to a korean starcraft master. sometimes i would work late nights, motivated to work only by fear of failure from a supervisor. i felt like i was cramming for an exam. and day after day, week after week, this became my life. waking up in the morning to punch out numbers on a computer coming home and sleeping only to do the same thing the next morning. i have become a small cog in the big machine.

my life is a cubicle. not only are my testicles shackled to my seat, my thoughts are tethered and monitored by the Company. i can only think what is best for the Company, for Corporate America, for the Economy. in the big chess game between dueling forces that determine the direction of our society, mankind, i am a pawn. indispensable. forgettable. i was created to fight in a battle that i know nothing about.

but i do get paid. and i spend money. and i get paid. and i spend money. sometimes i would catch myself thinking, is there anything more to life than this? probably not. i didn't read it in any glossy brochures or anything.

they will probably find my dead body laying face down in a cubicle one day, with packaging peanuts scattered around, a few post it notes on my desk, excel silently humming away on my monitors. they will see the wounds on my fingers from banging out numbers a bit too intensely, working excel a bit too ferociously. they will find my eyes glazed and unfocused, figuring that my mind has rotted earlier, leaving only my physical body, with the hot keys ingrained from years of building models, left to continue to work. they will look for any signs of medical illness, any previous record of heart disease or high cholesterol or gout, and upon seeing a clean bill of health, write it off as another casualty. it happens, they will say. another sacrifice, albeit necessary, to maintain and preserve the Economy. and two hours into finding my body, they will reset the computers and clean the packaging peanuts, prepare the desk for a new pawn, young, eager, full of ambition, and unaware of his eventual demise.

and the Company will continue to recruit. NYU Stern will continue to tell aspiring young minds to forgo their engineering skills to begin a life full of excitement on the front lines of finance. that supporting the Economy is a good thing. that it is the only thing worth living for.

andy

joy of less

"The millionaires I know seem desperate to become multimillionaires, and spend more time with their lawyers and their bankers than with their friends (whose motivations they are no longer sure of). And I remember how, in the corporate world, I always knew there was some higher position I could attain, which meant that, like Zeno’s arrow, I was guaranteed never to arrive and always to remain dissatisfied."
Pico Iyer

(full op ed here)

andy

hello

hey

i may or may not continue updating this, but for more random stuff please check out

andyjiang.tumblr.com

hope all is well,

andy

kanye loves fishsticks in his anus

kanye's crew as featured on south park:



kanye's real crew:

and i thought it was a total exaggeration!

andy

haha good times

it is late and i should be writing my ISP paper, but i spent a good chunk going through facebook pictures of IBEX. i think this one picture sums up my sentiment pretty well:




<3

andy

pictures, continued

i thought of this during ISP class today.

the recruiting event

haha enjoy,

andy

some pictures

^ not acceptable: singing horribly on the subway.

^ acceptable: singing horribly on the subway and asking for money.

haha i was so bored.

enjoy.

andy

blackcock day of reckoning

hello everyone. for those of you who care enough about my life to continue reading, this entry will be a compilation of the questions i received today at superday. this was for blackrock financial modeling group.

--

technical questions:

1)

use C++ to program an entire program (that should compile) that does the following:

takes 4 inputs (number of quarters, number of dimes, number of nickels, number of pennies) and return the total amount of change you have.

2)

what is deconstructing and why is it necessary?

3)

what is a resource like memory that when is allocated, must be de allocated?

4)

you have two random variables X and Y. both of their variances is 1. what is the variance of X + Y?

if given that the covariance between X and Y is 1, what is variance of X + Y?

5)

you have a rock in a boat sitting in a pool. you remove the rock and put it into the bottom of the pool. the rock's density is greater than water. does the level of water increase, decrease, or stay the same?

6)

integrate:

a)

integral of  1/x * dx

b)

integral of lnx  * dx

7)

integrate:

a)

integral from negative infinity to infinity: x* e^ (-x^2/2) * dx

b)

integral from negative infinity to infinity: e^(-x^2/2) * dx

find two more methods of integrating both integrals.

8)

what is duration of 10 year zero coupon bond?

what is duration of portfolio of 70% 10 year zero coupon bond and 30% 20 year zero coupon bond?

9)

in fixed income, what is convexity?

10)

write a recursive function.

11)

write a program that does the following (in compilable c++ code):

the input is a number. return true if the number has any number of consecutive numbers that add up to it (for example 5 would return true because 2+3, consecutive numbers, is 5. 4 would return false).

12)

write a program that calculates factorial with input n.

13)

what is dangling pointer?

14)

how to find the size of an 'int'? (integer object)

15)

write a program (pseudocode, thank GOD) that does the following:

take a string and reverses it (thanks mike gao)

16)

what is mortgage back security?

17)

what are chances that of 1000 flipped coins, 600 of them are heads?

18)

what does US government have influence over the mortgage backed securities? and for blackrock's clients?

--

other questions

1)

why family guy over simpsons and king of the hill?

2)

capital markets or computer science?

(i had the fudge this answer, of course.)

------------------

i think thats it. such an intense superday. but finally glad that its over!

andy

michael lewis weighs in

i came across this op ed piece by our beloved michael lewis (author of 'liar's poker') and it talks about wall street careers and our dreams. since i know a lot of people struggling with this, in times of recruiting and financial crisis, i highly suggest everyone to take a look. the last paragraph is gold and for people who don't know what they are doing and doing it because nyu stern tells them to then take his advice.

----------

A Wall Street Job Can’t Match a Calling in Life: Michael Lewis

Commentary by Michael Lewis

Dec. 10 (Bloomberg) -- Recently I received a letter from a young employee of a well-known financial firm, who asked that I not mention his full name, his employer or anything else that might give him away. Though a bit short on self-pity and self- dramatization, this letter was otherwise a fine example of a sort I’ve received often these past few months.

“I am writing you for advice,” Anthony (let us call him) began. “I graduated in May of 2008 and since July have spent my time entangled in the culture of (his well-known New York bank). I’m thinking about leaving. My dad labored his whole life so I could have the opportunity to do something like this, so leaving isn’t exactly what I want to do. I know if I stay here I could work unbelievably hard and move through the ranks, or maybe move firms… (but) I guess I’m starting to question the whole securities industry.”

The young man went on to concede that what attracted him to Wall Street was the chance to get rich quickly, and the excitement -- but that both of these things now seem gone forever.

“So I have this plan to go to Hollywood,” he wrote, but then instantly undermined himself. “I feel confused, a little stupid, but yet somewhat confident. I mean, I read your book, I figured out how to get to Wall Street from a non-Ivy League school, and I got here. The only question now is, if I leave, where do I go?”

Let me try to help sort it out:

Dear Anthony, On several occasions I have taken my own advice and it has almost killed me, and so I’m a tad uneasy about offering it up to you. But if you promise not to take it any more seriously than I do, I’ll answer you as best I can.

Let’s start by putting your problem into perspective: You still have a job. You work at one of the world’s biggest banks. It’s true: The thrill and money is rapidly being drained from such places. Your big bank, like all the other big banks, seems to be in the process of being nationalized -- thus the longer you stay the more you may find yourself in something resembling a government job. But that’s not all bad: Government jobs are secure. You are also young, in your early 20s, and without a family to support. That is, unlike the vast majority of the people on and off Wall Street, you have the luxury to wallow in your misfortune. Now let’s wallow. We’re at the beginning of a recalibration of the role of finance in global economic life. The excitement and the money that attracted you to Wall Street will probably not return for a long time. If these really are the only reasons you became a financier you probably should find something else to do with your life.

Hollywood Lurch

But before you go lurching into Hollywood let us make sure you aren’t simply repeating the mistake you made by lurching onto Wall Street. That is, let us focus less on your immediate condition -- safely employed but disillusioned -- to the habits and beliefs that led you into it. You were never exactly wrong. If you’d been born 10 years earlier and behaved exactly as you have done, your career might well have made you as rich and seemingly successful as you imagined your father wanted you to be. You simply came to Wall Street too late, and are in the strange position of a man who won the lottery on the first day there was nothing in the pot. The mistake you made, in your view, is to have played the lottery on the wrong day. The mistake you made, in mine, was to have played the lottery at all. There’s a question you might ask yourself: Am I looking for a job, or a calling? On the one hand the importance you attach to your career suggests a desire for a calling; on the other, your instinct to abandon your chosen career the moment it ceases to offer an easy path to fame and fortune, suggests that what you’re really in the market for is a job.

Job vs. Calling

The distinction is artificial but worth drawing. A job will never satisfy you all by itself, but it will afford you security and the chance to pursue an exciting and fulfilling life outside of your work. A calling is an activity you find so compelling that you wind up organizing your entire self around it -- often to the detriment of your life outside of it. There’s no shame in either. Each has costs and benefits. There is no reason to make a fetish of your career. There are activities other than work in which to find meaning and pleasure and even a sense of self-importance -- you just need to learn how to look. Reading between the lines of your letter I sense that some of your anxiety is caused by your desire for the benefits of each -- job and calling -- without the costs. Perhaps that is what led you to Wall Street in the first place, and why your mind now turns to Hollywood.

Doing Well

What Wall Street did so well, for so long, was to give people jobs that they could pass off to themselves as well as others as callings. Such was their exalted social and financial status: Wall Street jobs made people feel special without actually having to be special. You never really had to explain why you were doing it -- even if you should have. But really, the same rule that applies to properly functioning financial markets applies to other markets: There’s a direct relationship between risk and reward. A fantastically rewarding career usually requires you to take fantastic risks. To get your seat at the table on Wall Street you may have passed through a fine filter, but you took no real risk. You were just being paid, briefly, as if you had. So which is it: job or calling? You can answer the question directly, or allow time to answer it for you. Either way, I think you’d be happier if you stopped thinking of what the world had to offer you, and started thinking a bit more about what you had to offer the world. Real excitement isn’t just in whatever you happen to be doing, but in what you bring to it.

In the end, you have to look for it not on the outside, but on the inside. In my experience, if you find it, the other stuff will take care of itself.

Michael Lewis

---------

andy

interviewing skills 101

interviewing preparation is a key element of success in leaving your best impression upon the firm and the interviewer. for any given question, an appropriate response should be prepared and practiced so your tone and flow are genuine. since interviewers go through many candidates at a time, try to make your response unique: make your answer reflect your own personality and character and use stories and concrete examples that are true.

here are some common interview questions:


tell me about yourself.

my name is andy jiang, i'm 5'8'', 140lbs, blood type O, shoe size 10 american. i love runny egg yolk, hot sauce, and pulpy orange juice.


have you done any trading previously?

yes, i have bought and redistributed marijuana, adderall, and shrooms, and am fairly familiar with those markets in the new england area. i began my career in the drug market by specializing in high end marijuana markets doing individual sales to clients. as i became more familiar with the marijuana market, i moved towards sales between businesses, and ultimately began trading weight and focused on increasing trade volume. i focused on arbitrage opportunities and compared prices of different strains in different locations to determine any openings in the market. at the same time, i was constantly looking for investors and speculators who were interested in participating in the market. marijuana and adderall are highly liquid market (except during the end of college semesters for weed and during exams for adderall), whereas shrooms is highly illiquid market.


what makes you the best candidate for this position?

i was born with a keyboard in my hands. since the moment i was able to process sight, i was using microsoft excel. i have logged over 5000 hours ONLY doing control-c, control-v (my total logged hours for all excel functions exceed 8 years). i have wet dreams about spreadsheets and the little microsoft paper clip helper guy, only to wake up at the crack of dawn to pull open excel and start copying and pasting. there is no task imaginable that is more intellectually stimulating than repeat control c, control v. when i do not have the pleasure of sitting in front of a computer, i have a fake keyboard that i practice excel hot keys with, to keep my mind sharp.


remember to be honest and genuine while answering each question. practice in front of a mirror to help solidify your physical impression.


more to come later..

andy

--

the information presented in this entry is all false.

LOLstern

this was pretty well received in the facebook community so i thought i would share with the three people who read this blog.

andy

recruiting

this following is strictly fictional and may offend some readers. viewer discretion is advised.

----

in order to live the life of materialistic happiness, one has to suffocate oneself with shit.  in order to accumulate as much shit as possible, one has to sell one's soul to the devil by sacrificing one's free time, desires, emotions, passions, relationships with friends and family, in order to live the life of rolling around in shit.

meek people like to follow strong personalities and strong personalities pursue the shit.  eventually, everyone wants shit and it makes those with shit more attractive. they can just throw their shit around and others just want to bask in their shit. people find this lifestyle more and more appealing and strive to get into the shit industry (what is sacrificing my soul for a few ounces of shit anyway? its not like i had the creative prowess to do anything better with my time. in fact, i find that it is even economical for me to willingly give up my freedom to become a shit slave. i can let someone with more personality or talent in other areas of life to have a better chance in succeeding in their endeavors if i just suck it up and concede my life. why not.).

the desire to pursue shit is so strong that some institutions were established just for the sole purpose of flinging people into the world of shit. lets listen in to a conversation held between two shit chasers:

shit chaser 1: hey man, hows chasing shit going?

shit chaser 2: its allright. i have an interview with gay pee morgan, more-gay stanley, and bargays. what about you?

shit chaser 1: yeah i had blackcock today,  and wells faggo, shiti bank, and douche bank this week.

shit chaser 2: how was blackcock? i hope you didn't choke on it.

shit chaser 1: yeah, he eased into it, but picked up the pace quickly. had to try hard to remember to breathe and swallow.

--

shit chaser 1 reminisces about the interview:

master shit interviewer: so, what position are you interested in?

shit chaser 1: either bending over or on my knees.

--

shit chaser 2: seems like you answered correctly! i hope you get it.

shit chaser 1: yeah. i can't wait to give up all freedom and start rolling around in shit.

------

credits to shelley, jason, naman 

to be continued..

andy

saving babies

i am feeling good this past weekend about how things are turning out. as much as i hope that everyone can get their dream job, we all have to realize that this is not the most important thing in our lives.

my friends tell me that they're upset they didn't get second round investment banking interviews. i tell them this (first of all, if you know me, you know that i think investment banking is for losers and gheys):

'you're going to study all your finance and prep so hard for that investment banking interview, try to rock the socks off those hard nosed interviewers, then compete with a bunch of finance regurgitating tools, who in the past 3 years been studying finance everyday, got that internship at that hedge fund the summer after high school, and learned what a collateralized debt obligation was as a freshman, in the final round for one or two spots. then you're going to spend your entire  summer working 100+ hours a week, crunching numbers in a small cubicle in lower manhattan, and the only time you will find sleep by locking yourself in the firm's bathroom. you'll never have free time to go out and spend the measly money that you are making and will probably gain several pounds because the bank pays for your meals if you work past 6pm. after spending your entire summer sucking corporate banking dick, you'll cling to the fleeting hope that you will get a full time job offer, where you'll spend the next two or three years of your life crunching numbers in the same small cubicle in lower manhattan, gaining weight, and losing sleep. if you're lucky, you'll die in a freak bagel-related violent accident.'

(investment bankers are true corporate slaves: they sell their soul to the devil by working on raising capital for corporations, work very late into the night, work on the weekends. the bank, however, compensates them well. at least they used to before the banking crisis. now these corporate slaves just get the banking name prestige, which probably is also declining rapidly in value.

its all about sales and trading, in my opinion. but that is for another entry. if you're interested in sales and trading in wall street, check out michael lewis's liar's poker, a sharp witted book about the crazed bond trading in 1980s and the birth of the mortgage backed security.)

so if we don't get that job, we'll work for a year or two doing some random shit, realize our true intelligence/ability after coming out of the educated bubble of our respective universities, then naturally gravitate towards our ideal job. but this will only work if we remain positive and try to increase our 'upward' opportunities by following our passions and dreams.

so who gives a shit about our interviews? just go in and have some fun. don't take summer internship interviews--or life, for that matter--too seriously.

andy

interviews

i made it alive from my first sales and trading interview.

i didn't know how true the whole 'know your resume' is for interviews. since i put family guy as one of my interests, i got a question about it.

interviewer: 'so me and mark and some of the traders on the floor were looking at your resume and decided to ask you this particular question. in family guy, which scene was longer: peter singing the bird, or peter fighting the chicken?'

me: 'of course peter fighting the chicken. that scene spanned two episodes.'

interviewers to each other: 'ahh hes right. better go tell that to the guys on the trading floor'

nice.

andy

the jungle, revisited

hello everyone, i hope this entry finds you well.

its been a while since i've posted. been too busy in the flurry of internship applications, classes (well class is never THAT busy), finding a job, reading books (attempting to), seeing friends that i haven't seen for months, and just plain catching up with good ol' new york.

new york is great. stern (nyu business school), on the other hand, sucks. just the mentality that is going around now like the influenza, infesting the innocent tender minds of the students. everyone has turned into a zombie, applying without discretion to internships, going to recruiting events, whoring themselves out to all recruiters and (for those desperate) anyone in a business suit.

it is disgusting. the world of undergraduate business relies on the financial world, which is governed by the bulge banks, large investment houses on wall street. ugrad finance students would listen to every word that any investment bank releases. 'oh, goldman sachs said to take this derivatives course? i'll take it three times and get the four related books from the library in addition to the two books recommended for the class..' and now with the banking and financial crisis, the biggest banks are fucking up. major consolidations in the industry (bear stearns+jp, bank of america+merrill, RBS and ABN, citi shitting everywhere, etc), nationalization (partly RBS), and of course death (lehman). who the hell are the students going to turn to?

so here they are, going crazy over recruiting and applying to internships, as if that was the sole purpose of coming to nyu, instead of getting a bachelors of science degree (which is true, sadly. why else learn fixed income instruments if i can't get a job making tons of money?). people talking about people talking about people about who got what interview at what time for what division. all of a sudden we're back in high school talking about college admissions.

wall street and the world of finance runs on information. nyu stern is a giant bubble. no one really knows what is going on out there except that shit is going to go down and more shit will go down this year. who knows how long we'll be in this recession, or what the financial landscape will look like when we finally emerge out of the cave. will a finance degree still be worth it? will working on wall st be the same, big bonuses and models and bottles?

(hardly. obama already criticized wall street for those bonuses, especially now since banks are getting bailed out by the government. but that is for another entry)

so this is it, this is us, wandering in the depths of some cave trying to find our way out. only time can tell what the future holds.

- andy

hong kong is the shit

tsim sha tsui and mong kok.

x3

andy

happy 牛 year

hello blogosphere, so sorry for being so easily distracted by youtube, gchat/msn and other messaging clients, and the abundance of mindless entertainment known as 'the Internet' that has been keeping me away from shitting out a few words on this URL.

this entry will be a departure from the usual emo financial or the china related entries. just some quick thoughts at the moment that will scurry away if i don't put them into words.

things i miss most about the united states:

1) chipotle chicken fajita burritos

it makes sense. the united states borders mexico and any sane mexican will have illegally crossed the border to live in the us (except the recent financial crisis, where many mexicans have gone back to their country, a sign that speaks volumes of the state of america). and its not just because america is 'the land of opportunity' but because mexico is a shit place to be. to see the extent of how much mexicans are trying to escape their own country, there are mexicans in the northernmost parts of canada.

when mexicans go to north america, there are a few jobs that they are suited for. construction, preparing the ingredients at restuarants, forming gangs/organized crime. and with many mexicans bringing their culture and heritage with them, there will inevitably be a few tacos and burritos here and there.

china, unfortunately, is not blessed to be neighbors with a country like mexico. the mexican food here, as few as they are, cannot match the standards of the likes of chipotle (which i even doubt the true authenticity of, but its delicious nonetheless). i will just have spoonfuls of msg (abundant in all corners of china) until i get back to the states to satisfy my chipotle craving.

and not just chipotle chicken fajita burritos with sour cream and red hot sauce, stuffed so huge and bursting at its seams that the first bite into its lime onion goodness is an explosion of flavor in your mouth. i miss new york style pizza, american burgers, new york's chicken and rice.

2) black people

all of the youtube videos of 'lean wit it rock wit it' could have helped with my black people withdrawal my first weeks in beijing. everyone in china is chinese and they all look the same. chinese people's idea of 'diversity' is 'oh there are northern chinese people here as well as southern chinese people'. there would be an occasional white person that everyone stares at and points to and says ‘老外’. next time i see a white person, i'm going to point and stare and scream 'harry potter' (credits go to paul rau).

3) new york 24 hour delis on every street corner

for all those late night cravings that aren't mcdonalds, i wish there were delis. delis with all the usual beverages, all the junk food, all the sandwiches, indian or asian clerks, drunken customers, that you can ask for. the only 24 hour food joints near my home in beijing is the mcdonalds and the very occasional old asian dude making 煎饼 (which is a godsend because mcdonalds can only be so good the first 50 times in terms of cheap delicious drunken food).

and not just eating establishments. i miss the 24 hour bus system and subway system. when i go out in beijing and get really trashed, i know that the cab back will be at least 60 kuai (around $8.79). in new york, it is only $2 (around 13.64 kuai) to go anywhere at anytime on the subway. i was not able to fully appreciate new york city's mass transit system until using another that of another city.

there is no other place in the world like new york, that can match its constant pace (however fast and unforgiving it is) and convenience and ability to offer something for everyone. no matter what you are looking for, any kind of food/culture in the world (queens is the most diverse place on the planet), any kind of lifestyle, any kind of form of entertainment, new york has it.

of course, it would not be fair to glorify the states and new york without an equally set of positive remarks about my experiences in china.

things i will miss most about china:

1) cheap everything

everything in china is so absurdly cheap compared to the states. but the longer you stay here, the more you realize you can buy for less RMB. for instance, the first month i was here, i was taking cabs everywhere, going out to clubs every night, eating the most lavish dishes i could get my hands on. the longer i stayed, the more cheap things i found. and the opportunity cost of everything increased, so i would start taking the subway and then the bus. i would find the cheapest bar with the best happy hour (so far la bamba at 10 kuai a pint of beer, but that still couldn't beat the price at the hostel in 西安 haha, good times). i would eat on campus to save money.

the shopping markets in china are also absurdly cheap, especially the fake ones. had i not shopped with a local, i would've been absurdly ripped off and i would have no idea. fake nike shoes? around 70 kuai (around $10). of course they would fit awkwardly but for appearances, i would say they are quite similar. tshirts--40 kuai ($5.86). tailored suits--600 kuai ($87.95). some things are so retardedly cheap that it is beyond me how much it actually costs to make them.

the subway is 2 kuai to go anywhere. and buses more cheap--as low as 4 mao. needlesstosay, prices here cannot be found in the states and will be sorely missed (that being said, if you want anything let me know and i will get it for you).

2) being an ABC (american born chinese)

i actually am not a real ABC, because i was born in china and moved to the states when i was 1. but since i was raised in america with american values and american way of thinking, i am a total abc.

but chinese people in our generation totally love the west. i say a few words of english and they treat you differently, as if you are one social class above the locals. i get a sense of american elitism when in china and i derive a perverse inward pleasure in speaking on the phone loudly in english and seeing everyones reaction. because i'm so vain and self centered, like the american i am.

i'm going to miss being treated like that. back in the states, i'm just some average asian kid studying finance. and as america, which encourages self identity and self expression, i lose that edge amongst all other americans fighting for that same attention from everyone else. in china, everyone is trying to blend into the crowd that my wild arm flailing gait and exaggerated laugh and gesticulations, whilst common in the states, draws more attention than i realize. and as an american, full of myself and thinking that i'm so cool that i am from the states where the burgers are juicy and the burritos are stuffed, i don't mind the attention.

3) 煎饼 (jian1 bing3)

how could i write things i will miss most about china without mentioning one of the most delicious food item in the entire world: the 煎饼. these are salty crepes folded around thin fried dough with green onions, cilantro, an egg and special 煎饼 sauce (i actually have no idea what the sauce is, the best things in china of course have their own special sauces) made in little carts wheeled around by old chinese dudes. these are considered a breakfast item and most carts are around during breakfast time (6am-9am or something absurdly early that i never get them during actual breakfast hours). but i go to the usual 煎饼 stand that sits across the street from my building.

there is nothing else more satisfying than biting into a hot, crisp, chewy, spicy, folded egg pancake in the cold winter air. especially if you add a chinese sausage into the already amazing 煎饼.  the smell of 煎饼 can awaken someone in the deepest coma and can stir the hunger of someone who has already eaten a seven course meal. i have not lived until i had my first bite of 煎饼.

to add to 煎饼, there are several other chinese food items that i will miss: 串儿 (anything on sticks, typically lamb meat, a beijing specialty) and 酸奶 (drinkable yogurt--why don't the states have this??). here are some other chinese food that i will miss, but not as much because they have them in the states: 川菜, 湘菜, 点心, 小笼包, 贵州菜. anything spicy, absolutely.

and thus ends my procrastination on internship applications.

enjoy,

andy